Essay

As I read the letter, I cried… Who knew it would still hurt? A year had passed and yet.. Yet the memories still burns clearly in my head as though it happened just yesterday. Never did I know my feelings for him were this solid.

Oh! How I loved him.

It all started early last year on my way back from school. I was 15 then, still in my early years and yet to mature. As I was strolling down the pavement under the blazing sun, my eyes chanced upon this one unique shop. A lone figure stood behind the display window.

I stopped in my tracks. Did he just wink at me?

Somehow his action made my heart skip a beat. My face flushed a deep red which made me frown. What on earth is happening to me?

Feeling very quizzical with my reaction, I decided to meet this figure in person. Pushing the door open, I was greeted with a jolt of never ending delight as I came face to face with him. My eyes grew wide and I was practically going gaga over him.

I stood like that for a full 15 seconds before the shop owner came up to me. “I see you have taken a fancy on Ash here,” he grinned.

Obviously startled and annoyed by his remark, I dashed out of the shop embarrassed, thanking the lord that the owner didn’t notice the distinct trail of drool beside my mouth. Thoughts of Ash’s handsome face of startling green eyes and brown hair were set inside this small brain of mine.

Yes, that was how I met him. How I met sweet, lovable Ash. Ever since then, it became my daily routine to visit him everyday in that shop. Talking to him gave me great joy as he was a good listener and friend. But of course, I wanted to be more than just friends… It took me a whole lot of courage to ask him out.

After 3 months of our ‘unforgettable’ encounter, I tried asking the owner to give Ash a day off. Every attempt was futile. It wasn’t until I bribed him with the latest Megan Fox posters did he budge. Lucky thing he's a devoted fan of the actress eh?

It wasn’t much of a date though, more like a stroll in the park. I enjoyed watching him play with the local pets while I chat with the pet owners. However, it was the best experience I’ve ever had in my romance life. Every second with him was pure bliss and I wished it would never end.

Too bad it did.

A few months after the event, Ash started to behave strangely. He became distant and withdrawn from me as though I’m an evil plague. I tried getting answers from him but to no avail. He even spat out the sandwich I made for him. How rude can he get?!

Furious and hurt, I tried consulting my best friends in hopes for explanations. Instead of words of comfort, I received many accusations such as “It is his kind’s nature to do such a thing!” and “He’s just the type to toss you away for someone new” directed to him. It infuriated me to have my friends insult him despite his actions towards me. Some friends they are...

Clueless on what to do, I turned into one of self pity, cowering in my own room as if it shields me from the pain I had to endure. I even resorted to food for comfort – ice cream to be exact. The sweet substance managed to cure me to some extend.

It all came to an end when my mum dragged me away from my room to give me a 30 minute lecture. I winced from the harsh words I heard. She’s right, I thought. Wallowing in self pity doesn’t help a bit, especially health-wise.

Eating ice cream exacts a heavy toll on my body and I don’t think I can take another tongue lashing on pricey ice-cream from my mum. You see, I chose to wolf down on my mum’s favourite brand of ice-cream; Haagen Dazs, which is not exactly the best choice to pick, no?

So then started my efforts to turn over a new leaf. Keeping up with my studies, losing the extra weight I gained and just living out my life helped take my mind off recent events. This lasted for 2 months and I was happy again.

Life felt wonderful. Life was great. That was, until I received a voicemail from the shop owner. He requested that I meet up with Ash and reconcile.

Hah! As if that will ever happen.

It was very annoying though, to have a constant stream of voicemails ranging up to 10-20 per day. At last I couldn’t take it anymore and decided to return his call. All he said was,

“I think you should come by to the shop. You’ll understand why.”

His answer disturbed me a great deal for yes, I do want to know why Ash had acted the way he did. On the other hand, I was scared to know the truth. Not to mention I doubt I can hold back from slapping the shop owner from his continuous stream of voicemails as his efforts had literally fried my expensive cellphone.

In the end I decided to drop them a quick visit. Stopping in front of the shop, I was startled to see the shop decorated with black draping. The atmosphere around it seemed grim and silent.

Shaken to see the once lively shop in such a state, I pushed back the door and walked in. The lights were dim and candles were everywhere in the shop. Everything seemed to be like normal except for the table placed in the middle. On it was a small casket, only big enough to fit a baby.

My mouth went dry. My heart started to pound at a brisk pace as the room started to narrow down onto the casket. Taking a step towards the table, I silently said under my breath, “No, this can’t be. No….”

I emitted a wail of despair at what I saw lying in the coffin. There lay Ash with a serene look on his face. Tufts of his hair were gone, leaving bald patches among his once magnificent brown body. Somewhere in the corner emerged the shop owner, his face stripped off his usual cheeky aura.

“It was cancer. The doctors couldn’t help him as it was too late. He was in the final stage of cancer before they found out his sickness.”

I stayed still. Seeing that I wasn’t about to say anything, he bowed his head and whispered.

“I am sorry.”

Then the tears came.

Soon after this was his funeral. It was held in his favourite spot; the park where we first went out to. Not many attended as he had very few relatives and friends. But it was as any funerals are meant to be - dark, depressing, filled with dreaded emotions.

And now here I am, remembering the painful past. It wasn’t easy writing this letter explaining to my friend about Ash but… I know I have to move on. Dwelling on past events won’t make me feel better unless I acknowledge it.

Sighing, I looked up to the starlit sky, absorbing the peace of the night. Smiling a weak smile, I chanted under my breath.

“Ash… You’ll always be my favourite cat.”


Soso, what do you guys think?? Its a remake of my original copy, and a better one at that. Give me your truthful comments kay? :D